Disappointment...

I just got my letter from the company saying I'll have no increment this year - reason being, my performance last year was below what the company expected of me :( Ouch!

Needless to say, I'm feelin' the blow of it. Had been hoping the increment would come in as I've just signed up for an endowment policy and the extra money would have been handy. Sigh sigh sigh...

Am supposed to go for a work-related conference tomorrow, but at this moment, I don't really want to go. I know most of my colleagues probably would have gotten an increase and that makes me feel even worse!

My employers aren't exactly the most generous people on this planet but at least last year I DID get a bit of an increment even tho not much. This year's bonus was dismal as well - for the whole department and they blamed it on us not meeting the student numbers, so I was hoping for the increment.

I know money is not everything but I just can't help but feel disappointed somehow...and this brings back thoughts of wanting to change jobs - and all those thoughts that are related to it which I've thought about so many times. I told myself I'd stay with the company til I complete my Masters, but right now, I'm not so sure if it's the right move....

Perhaps I'd feel better in a few days....

Thinking about home...

I've been trying to figure out a time to go home (to Meow city - Kuching) this year, but so far, I've come up blank. You see, normally I'd make it a point to go home at least twice a year - during CNY and once more sometime in the middle of the year so that I can spend some time with family and catch up with friends (so they won't forget me!) but this time round, if I'm accepted for Masters then I most probably can't go back since classes will start in July and I won't have any long breaks til the end of the year....

Friends have been asking me when I'm planning to go back...and all I can say is...I DUNNO...Heheheh....Perhaps I can't go back til next year...sob sob...I especially miss my lil bro who always asks me "When you want to come back???" whenever I call home...and of course, I miss everyone else in my family and friends too.....plus the great Kuching food!

On the bright side, I'm finally going to Bangkok this year for missions - been wanting to go ever since the first trip they had some time in 2003/04 and am so elated to be going at last! It'll be for a week, from 18-25 June 05. For one, I'll get to put a stamp on my unstamped passport (made it coz I wanted to travel but have not had the chance til now) and of coz, I will get to experience a lil of what it's like to be in another land, sharing the Gospel of Christ with them. I'm a bit nervous thinking about the street evangelism that we'd be involved in, but am looking forward to the trip as a whole. So, I've fulfilled my 'quota' of at least ONE out-of-the-country travel for this year! :)

One of these days I MUST make a trip down to Singapore....not that there's a particular reason to be there, it's just that it's so near, and I've not been there for nearly 10 YEARS (!) - it's like what...only 5 hours away by road...so there's no reason why I can't go...except for $$$ lar....one of the things holding me back from going is that EVERYTHING in S'pore is sooooooooo EXPENSIVE....sigh....

And if you ask me where I'd most like to go (outside of Asean), I'd say Brisbane coz that's where my fav uncle is, and I've been meaning to visit him when I have saved up enough...am hoping that day will come sooner than I think it will...somehow, I know lots of friends who end up going to Australia, so it'd be great to meet them too if I actually end up going....

Hmm....fingers freezin' now...brrr....so I think I'll stop for now...

First real post??

I've been toying with the idea of getting a blog for some time now...and i always have the same arguments for NOT starting one...like not having the time to update the blog, and not wanting the whole world to know like *ahem* intimate details about me :P (of coz, not that i think they'd care to know, but the thought of it is just a bit unsettling)...and then there's this other part of me who thinks it'll be nice to have some place where i can kinda pen my thoughts down...coz occasionally i find myself wanting to leave a long comment on someone else's blog...and i thot...why not get my own?? And so i ding dong-ed back and forth, and finally...finally...i gave in :)

There are a few people who inspired me to start my own blog (you know who you are!) and I hope this blog will be kept alive for a long time...if time permits...hehe....

Been pondering about my life for the past 2-3 days....triggered by a conversation over msn with a friend, that led me to think about whether i've been living life for all it's worth, or if i've been too comfortable where i am, that i'm afraid to try new things...he said i shud go find something that interests me, and go try something different....(told chris about this) and i said i was lazy! haha....but actually, these have been recurring thoughts - like when people ask me, "What are your talents?" I usually have to think VERY VERY HARD! Apart from the fact that I'm good with languages, I can't think of anything else! So sad rite?

Let's see....I USED TO (operative word here) play the piano, but din go all the way to Grade 8, and tried playing for the church back home for a bit but found that playing in front of so many people really isn't for me, and for some reason, have not had the urge to play the piano for years...

I took up ballet for like maybe a year when i was 12 (i know, rather 'old' dy) but i just wanted to try lar...went for swimming lessons, joined the St John Ambulance - all at the same time (and used to be on the same day too, like i shared with Ev)

All the way in Sec School, i was rather active but when it came to uni days....and now, i think i've lost so much of my interests in different things dy...and find myself coming up short when it comes to being good or skilled in anything.....sigh....

I envy people who can play instruments or sing well, can paint, draw, can do creative artistic stuff, can cook, play all kinds of sports....i'm none of the above! Aiseh....ok ok, dun wanna have a pity party here...

I think u all get what i mean....so any ideas on how i can spice up my life? Get the motivation to live more dangerously? Hehehe....

OH dear...this is turning out to be a looooonnnngggggg post....u guys fallin' asleep yet?

My blog at last!!

Hey all,

FINALLY FINALLY FINALLY I decided...I want to get a blog! :P
So Ev and Chris, here's to you! *Cheers!*
Neway, hope I find the time to update it now and then...and hope you'll enjoy reading it, and commenting on it too...see ya around!